Trust, secrecy and low libido in lasting love
Emotional affairs often grow inside ordinary routines—work, messaging, shared confidences, and the gradual movement of intimacy outside the partnership. Glass explains boundaries, secrecy, betrayal trauma, disclosure, and rebuilding trust through her influential “walls and windows” framework. Low libido may be part of a couple’s wider disconnection, but it neither excuses deception nor explains every affair. In a season of transition, the book offers language for distinguishing friendship from hidden attachment and for understanding why recovery requires more than ending contact. Safety returns through honesty, empathy, consistent boundaries, and a willingness to face the injured partner’s questions without minimizing the damage.
About Shirley Glass
Shirley Glass began researching extramarital relationships in 1975, long before emotional affairs received much attention. Decades of treating couples made betrayal trauma—not moral spectacle—the center of her work, earning her the description “godmother of infidelity research.”
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